Back to top

Dissertation Defense: Pass! 博士論文口頭試験 合格!

yoko katz December 23, 2015 8 comments

I passed my dissertation defense in PhD Economics last week!  My husband and son celebrated my achievement with a cake and Champagne on the same day.  It was a long, and sometimes rough, journey to come to this day.  I still have to make some minor revisions, but the major parts are all done!  A big relief! (Yes, this is THE big project I have been referring as a big project in this blog.)

In the picture above, I took off my hat while defending it.  I tried to look moderately stylish, but hopefully looked smart to defend a serious paper.  How do you rate?

I was ready and anxious to get over with.  I did not get nervous at all though.  After going through my cancer battle, that was tough and made me very nervous.  I experienced physical pain, and physiological pain such as panic attacks and depression.  This dissertation defense, I felt it was mush under my control.  I knew what I did in my paper.

My husband told me he would come home with a Champagne to celebrate it.  I told my son about the news and he told me we should celebrate it with a cake.  That was a sweet idea!  So, I told my husband to pick up a cake as well so that all three can have it.

博士論文 シャンパン お祝い 乳癌

When I was diagnosed with cancer in June 2014, I had an idea of giving up my PhD.  It was 90% done, but my mind set came to the point of thinking: “why do I bother?  I have cancer.  A life is too short to stick to the idea of completing dissertation.  My friends are making advance in career, while I have been a student all my life…, now I have cancer.  I am stuck with my dissertation.  Why do I bother to complete it?”  Cancer overwhelmingly occupied my mind.

エリックケイザー マンハッタン ケーキ お祝い

I learned great patience while treating my cancer.  Schedule wise, nothing went as I wished.  “A next appointment” could be scheduled in 2 weeks, while I wanted to have it right away.  Meanwhile, what about my cancer, does it get worse?  Well, the earliest appointment can be scheduled in 2 weeks.  At a doctor’s office, I waited for a long time (at some of the offices).  Chemotherapy and its recovery process took long time and my energy was low.  Each chemotherapy took my day for the treatment.  I left home at 6:30 AM and came home around 4 to 5 PM.  I spent 5 months in bed, except when I went out for teaching -twice a week-.  I was fortunate to have great family and friends, I did not have to do any of house chores because of them.  I focused on my treatments.   I personally could not do much, but a life of my family with a child went OK.  (Thank you, my family and friends, again.)

博士論文 口頭試験 合格 お祝い 夕食 アスパラガス トマト パンプキンスープ ポークとスモークサーモン

Especially since my last IV injection treatment this summer 2015, I finally felt I was ready to go back to my big “undone” project: dissertation.  I relied on my family and friends once again.  Our home looked messy, but nobody was dying, let it be.  Things at home would be OK, just like while I was chemo treatments.  I learned now patience to do a big project.  I did not really have “weekends,” “holidays” and “socializing” for awhile, my mind was on dissertation 24/7.  Finally, I defended!

I will have a great holiday season this time!  A happy holiday season, everyone!

経済学の博士課程 口頭試験合格!ハズバンドと息子が、当日の夜 ケーキとシャンパンでお祝いしてくれた。ここまで来るのに、すごく長くかかった。まだ 少し手直しをしないといけないけれど、大まかな流れは変えないので、ほとんど終了!いゃったー!

口頭試験の外見。それなりに私らしいスタイル、でも 真面目な論文をするのに 賢そうな格好と思ってスタイリングした格好で。どうかしら?帽子とスカーフは、外にいたときだけ。中では取ってました(女性は室内で帽子を取らなくていいんだけれど)。


癌を経験して、辛抱強くなったと思う。スケジュールは自分の思うようには進まない。「次のお医者さんの予約は、そうねぇ、2週間後しか空いていません。」と、今すぐ見てもらいたいのに 病院からのお返事はのんびり。お医者さんに行けば行ったで、待ち時間が2時間。ひどいときは4時間。抗がん剤治療は4時間、お手洗い以外座っている。朝6時半に家を出て、帰ってくるのが夕方4時5時の時もあった。家に居れば、ベッドの中で、気力なし。とことん何もしないで横になっている。幸せなことに、やさしい家族と友達に恵まれて、自分で家事が出来なくても、なんとか、子供のいる家庭生活も成り立っていった。(とても感謝している。)

2015年夏、最後の点滴治療を終えて、一区切りがついた。残りの人生で、生きているうちにやるべき事を終わらせなくては:第一弾は、博士論文。再び、家族と友達に迷惑をかけながらの論文生活。家の中はぐちゃぐちゃ、ご飯の準備も手抜き。将来の計画をする時間すらない。でも、そんなことで誰も死ぬことはないから、もうそのままで突き進む。家族や友達とのお約束も、全部「終わったらね」と後回し。週末・休日・運動する時間 全部なくして 論文論文。辛抱強さは学んだので、じっとこらえてやり抜く。やった、そして やっと先週 口頭試験(defense)をパス!

寝不足だった日々を取り戻すかのごとく とにかく寝る。そして、クリスマス準備を全くしてこなかったので、短時間でクリスマス準備もしなくちゃ!です。素敵なクリスマスを 皆さん!癌もなし、博士論文もなし な年末年始になりそう。にしし。やった~!!!



  1. Kaori


    • Kaoriさん。

      にしし、ありがとう。これで もう 思いっきり!(採点たまってるんだけどね。。。いつもなら さっさと終わってるのに。。。)でも 本当 思いっきり 楽しめそうよ。

  2. 千織


  3. ふわ



    ファッションも とでもオシャレだに!

  4. So you did it. Congratulations!
    By the way, I’m studying an archetype right now. You are “Fashionista” for sure.
    Have a happy new year to you and your love ones.


    • Aiko-san,

      Yes, finally, I came all this way! I am so happy!
      I wonder what archetype is. Yes, I truly enjoy fashion and I believe in power of fashion as well.
      My next goal is to empower patients with fashion.

      A happy and healthy new year to you, too!